A few months ago I stood at the edge of the Midmar Dam, heart pounding, goggles fogging, questioning my sanity and scanning for emergency exits! I had signed up for the Midmar Mile, a one-mile open water swim. For someone who has always believed she’s not a strong swimmer, no scratch that; a swimmer, this was more than just a physical challenge, it was a massive mental stretch.
At the onset of training, I knew it would be challenging as I had a lot to learn physically; I have never been able to swim front crawl/freestyle, or with my head under water. I was not prepared though for the additional challenge that came as I quickly realised that swimming with my head under water created an overwhelming feeling of panic and claustrophobia.
Each training session, as the water closed over me, was a lesson in breathing through fear, finding calm in discomfort, and in backing myself even when my instinct was to retreat.
Race day brought its own mental battle. All of my training was done in a pool – calmer, clearer (literally, you can see what’s underneath you!) and less congested. At the dam, the water was choppy, the crowds were big and the distance never-ending. Every stroke was a quiet defiance of the voice in my head that said I couldn’t and the muscles in my body that begged me to stop. But I kept going, one stroke at a time.
Crossing that finish line was more than just completing a swim, it was a gift to my current and future self as I broke through some self limiting beliefs and showed myself just how capable I am. As I walked out of the water, full of energy (the stiffness and aches hadn’t set in at that point!) I wasn’t just thinking “I did it,” but also wondering; What else is possible?!
This wasn’t just about swimming. It was about setting a goal that scared me, that I wanted to back out of, and choosing to do it anyway. It was about confronting the limits I’d placed on myself and realising they weren’t real.
If you’re reading this, it probably means there are some fears you are facing and a finish line you want to cross. So my question to you is; what could happen if you stop believing your own limits? And, what are you going to do next to prove to yourself just how strong and capable you are?
PS. A big thank you to my husband who agreed to take the plunge with me, quite literally. Knowing I had my own lifeguard/coach/pace setter all rolled into one was a source of calm and strength and completing this together was incredible.
